How I stayed safe in the Kitchen

Do you find yourself having breakdowns at home with your kids around?

Do you have a child that stays in their room a lot and disengages from the family?

I was that child. At age nine, I decided to build myself into a little wall, an imaginary wall to keep myself safe. And, in doing so, it had me in my room quite a lot. I didn’t want to engage with my family. It was very hard for me to feel connected and to open up and want to speak to them. And I would stay in there for as long as possible, just come out to eat and then go back. At times, throughout the days and usually on weekends, I would go into the kitchen and I would bake because it was something that didn’t cost a lot of money and things we had the ingredients for. I would be able to do this in solitude and it offered some peace to me. It offered refuge from boredom.

I knew that I was making something tasty and something from scratch and something that I was doing for myself and by myself. Of course, I would share with the family, but it was just a little extra excitement that I had in the day. Wouldn’t it have been nice if my mom or my brothers and sisters were involved in that? And if you have kids that are sort of closing themselves down from the family, try cooking with them or put out some ingredients for them and a recipe and see if they might do it on their own. Then maybe they’ll warm up to you doing it with them.

Cooking can be a great bonding experience and can draw themselves out of themselves and connect with you in a different way.